Suerk's Birthday

Suerk never has cared much about marking his birthday with any kind of celebration. This year is no exception. Yesterday he had a nurse connect him with his friend since boyhood, Tom Weber. The message, “Don’t let anyone throw any birthday stunts. No hoopla!” Tom promptly cancelled the parade.

I try to keep the ‘feelings discussions’ to a minimum. He offers what he wants, when he wants. I pry when I think it might help him, but that’s not often. It’s important to me that he not associate my calls with therapy sessions. He never did take to that kind of thing. But yesterday I said the obvious to him. “I guess there was no way you ever could have imagined you would be celebrating your 71st in quite this way.” In true Suerken fashion, he said, “Boohoo! Poor me!" I don’t exaggerate when I say that I have not heard a hint of self-pity in his voice since the accident. And as you can see, he finds self-deprecation far more appealing than he does self-pity.

As always, I read Suerk the letters that come through the email address, "forpaulsuerken@gmail.com" He loves having that connection.